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Home > The storm before the calm... I'm hoping :(

The storm before the calm... I'm hoping :(

May 5th, 2010 at 02:56 am

Well. It seems things are getting worse before they get better... got a text from mom earlier. It seems one of the many fights her and my brother have been getting into got a bit bigger, and she consequently called the police. My brother is paranoid schizophrenic, and his outbursts have historically been rather violent and aggressive. I think mom's reaction was more precautionary than it was reactionary, but absolutely founded. Rather than her having her apartment smashed to bits, this seems to me the smartest choice that could be made.

The issue with this is that now he is in jail (again), and we have no idea what will happen to him, if they'll actually get him the help he needs, etc. It's been an incredible struggle for my mom trying to support him, get him to take his meds, keep him from being destructive, etc. It's terribly stressful on her-- regardless of whether he's in jail or out.

On top of that fiasco, my mom lost her job today. I'm not entirely clear as to why, but she really isn't either. She mentioned that her boss had been on her back a lot lately, and that it seemed they were getting irritated with her need for assistance with her job responsibilities-- but she also told them in the interviewing process that she hadn't done clerical work in decades, they never gave her the training they promised, and she had only been there for a few weeks. She hardly had time to get into the swing of things. Regardless, she was told "it wasn't working out," and today she became unemployed.

The woman just cant catch a break.

Needless to say, my efforts to help her find a job (and extra ways of making money) are going to be even stronger. I made the deposit into her account today-- $55 for my monthly phone bill, and $250 for mother's day. Pulled it from my savings, but I'll replenish it come payday. No worries there.

It's frustrating to be all the way on the other side of the country when things like this happen. I know it would be good for her to have some company, sit down and figure out a game plan. Give her a little sense of control in the situation. She didn't sound nearly as distraught when I talked to her as I had anticipated, but then again mom has always been one of those people amazingly good at concealing her emotions.

So things have definitely taken a step back, but I'm really hoping, and I'm rather confident, that they will turn around soon. I have to stay positive in all this. It wont do her any good for me to throw my arms up and say, "why us?" I just have to keep driving forward and find creative ways to handle the situation.

***

Aside from all that, my day has been long and tiring. I'm trying to finish this last paper, and be done with it so I can get to the work I do that makes me money. I sat down and mapped out all the things I need to get accomplished this week. Once I get done with this paper I'll have the freedom to start all that.

I'm sure I'll get it done tonight, I'm very close as it is. It's just difficult getting through it. I'm exhausted and worn out from working on it for the last few days. I want it to be over.

But again, just have to drive on. This weekend will be better. It's my last weekend here in Arizona, so I think I'm going to do *something*. Some of my class mates were talking about going to see the new Iron Man. I think that would be fun. And do some swimming at the pool (I love free entertainment, after all).

I'm really looking forward to coming home-- not only so I can try to help my mom get a handle on this situation, but also because I dearly miss BF. He's really proving himself to be an incredible source of strength, even thousands of miles away... but I miss being able to escape into the comfort of his arms. It's an wonderful place to be.

To sum this up, I hope you all are having a good week, and that it contines to be so. I'm hoping something great will happen. I'm sure it will.

1 Responses to “The storm before the calm... I'm hoping :(”

  1. mrs Says:
    1273080900


    Sounds like things are really rough right now for your mom Frown I hope things will improve. My only advice regarding the situation with your brother would be to have his parole or probation officer (if/when he has one) put him in touch with the local Social Services Dept. Might be a way for him to get the help he needs.

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