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Back again! With even more change this time.

June 1st, 2018 at 01:03 pm

So here we are again – I haven’t posted in quite some time, and a big life change is happening. So I come back to the SA community. Y’all have seen me through so many life changes. Why should this one be any different? Ha.

So I’m getting a divorce. DH and I have been unhappy for a long time and grown apart pretty drastically over the last few years since we got married. It’s been amicable – weirdly, lovingly so. We both know it’s the right thing to do, and we’ll both be better for it. Our divorce thus far has been far healthier than our actual marriage. Irony and all that. Nonetheless, it has been hard. We’ve been together almost 8 years. It’s going to be a lot of history to shift away from. It’s going to continue to be painful. But I’m trying to focus on opportunity and the chapter that lies ahead. There is plenty to be thankful for. Not the least of which being our continued support for one another.

The splitting up comes with a lot of logistical stuff to deal with, and going from two incomes to one is going to certainly be an adjustment. I’m apartment hunting right now. We’re on the hook for our current apartment until the end of July, so we have some time. Just seeing what’s out there and hoping something amazing in my price range pops up… We thankfully have about $20k saved up in our joint account since getting married. We’ll be splitting that down the middle. We have no shared property, so things should be pretty easy on that end. None of our belongings will be hotly contested or fought over, so it’s really just a process of getting it all done.

I drew up a budget for myself last week and was more than a little scared about making all of my student loan payments. I’ve been paying about $600/month in minimum payments, and an additional $180 for my car. Which is a lot for just my debt… But I think I’ve worked it all out for the best. I was able to get my big chunk of private student loans refinanced (approval went through today) – which not only dropped my minimum down, but also my interest rate went from an average 10% variable to a 6% fixed. Needless to say, I’m feeling pretty good about that right now. Really happy this full-time job thing worked out for me after all. Ha. So that dropped my minimum payments down by about $150/month. Then with the money we’re splitting, I’m going to pay off one of my federal loans (about $1600) – which will eliminate a $130/month payment AND the rest of my car (about $4400). I wont have a ton of savings to show for it, but at least I know I’ll be able to cover my bills. And of course I save on interest payments.

And while I will have dropped my minimum payments, I don’t plan to only pay the minimums. In fact, I’d like to continue paying about the same amount every month as I have been. I just want to make sure I’m good even if I can’t go above my minimums. Really, I’d like to aggressively pay my loans in the coming year – in a way that I couldn’t before (both because I was paying so much, and because DH was so appalled by my minimums that paying above was not an option). My plan is to divert the majority (if not all) of my freelance income toward debt. And step up the amount of that I’m doing.

My other plan is to ask for a raise – sooner than later. I have more than demonstrated my value since starting my job, and my boss is amply aware that I should be getting paid more. We’ll see what I can swing (or rather, what he can swing).

So I’m getting there. I’m plotting and planning and trying to figure out all of the things I’ll be able to manage through it all. To be completely honest, I’m ecstatic to get to live alone again. I really enjoyed it when I did. And while of course it was amazing to have shared finances, I’m excited to have the opportunity to really dig into paying off my debt in a way I haven’t been able to. I think it will be so freeing to see it being chipped away at, and will put me in a great position for the next chapter of my life – because I honestly don’t know what it will look like or where it will be.

I’m just beyond thankfully that I’m not finding myself in an awful position through all of this. I understand that I am truly lucky (from both an emotional and financial standpoint) for things to be as smooth as they are.

There are a million things I could update here, of course. But for now, I’m going to just be excited about this bit of progress. These days, taking things one day (or even hour, at some points) at a time is where I’m at. Just have to keep moving forward. Ever forward.

Hope y’all are well, and I look forward to catching up with your posts as I become more active!

11 Responses to “Back again! With even more change this time.”

  1. rob62521 Says:

    I'm very sorry, but it sounds like you have things under control. Glad it isn't a horrible situation.

  2. CB in the City Says:

    I'm so sorry. Even an amicable divorce is very stressful -- but if you are moving on to a better place, it will be worth the stress. Be good to yourself as you work through this!

  3. Rachael777 Says:

    hang in there!

  4. creditcardfree Says:

    Nice to hear from you. Sorry about the marriage, but it sounds like you are overall happy with the decision.

  5. Debt-free by Thir-ty Says:

    It's good to hear from you, although I wish it were under better circumstances. I'm sorry about the divorce, but it sounds like it's for the best, and you're planning well for the next step. Hope you stick around and everything works out!

  6. kashi Says:

    Hugs to you, friend...I know how hard that can be.

  7. double essay Says:

    It's great that you are feeling much better right now! I am certain that all your finanial dreams will come true soon!

  8. livingalmostlarge Says:

    I'm sorry for the tough times but good luck moving forward

  9. FrugalTexan75 Says:

    Good to hear from you. That's too bad about your marriage.

  10. paper topic about high school Says:

    I'm glad that you are experiencing this stage of your life with a positive and do not become discouraged, because it opens up for you a lot of new opportunities.

  11. find paper on our website Says:

    Something went wrong! It happened unexpectedly, and you don't know what to do...

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